Live Blog: Flapping Isn't Gonna Work

Here we go, kids. Live-blogging this spectacular Game Two battle between the Jets and Ducks. Are you ready? Not much to tell you other than Mathieu Perreault will play for the Jets, Matt Halischuk heads back to the press box, and Jiri Tlusty drops from the third- to the fourth-line. Anthems are being sung, so let's get right into this game!

FIRST PERIOD

• I like the pace so far in this game. Someone needs to hammer a Duck to slow them up. There's no way they'd be able to skate across the blue line without a new bruise being handed out.
• Clayton Stoner is trying to be a human wrecking ball. I've seen about enough of that.
• Love me some Adam Pardy. He should help Jakob Silfverberg out by taking his head off. No one enters that crease.
• How do you stick-check a guy like Myers? Seriously.
• Chris Thorburn needs to goad Stoner into a scrap.
• High-sticking? Maybe Pardy missed the memo about taking penalties.
• Ducks were 2-for-3 in Game One. Don't remind me.
• Solid forecheck by the Jets thus far. Nothing happening for the Ducks.
• Sonuva... can't the Jets just leave Kesler alone? He's useless.
• Myers will serve two-or-less for high-sticking as well.
• One penalty over after a big save by Pavelec.
• Watching Corey Perry cuss after missing a glorious chance is one of those little things that makes me smile every time I think about it.
• Buff the Destroyer just killing off 30 seconds of time. No biggie.
• Jets kill both penalties! Well done, boys!
• Let's tip our caps to Pavelec as the Jets at first commercial break are being outshot 14-3. No dented twine thus far!
• Cassie Campbell's piece on Kesler makes me hate him more. And Team USA. And the Canucks. The only team I don't hate that he's suited up for is the Manitoba Moose.
• I'm glad to see that Sportsnet is burning all their commercials early. This war shouldn't be missed by anyone.
• If that puckhog from the Boston Pizza played on my team, I'd beat 24 wings out of him if he did that on the ice. You jerk. 
• I love that Garry Galley gives the Ducks the edge after winning Game One. You kinda think that would be the case, no?
• Mike Duffy... er, Bruce Boudreau with a "what did I do" look. Shut up, Bruce.
• Hampus Lindholm is off for interference. Because he deserved it.
• Jets fail to get it deep, and Anaheim clears easily. Gotta be better.
• Did the Jets know they had the extra guy for the last two minutes?
• Not sure I like these defensive combos being rolled out by Charlie Huddy. How did Stuart and Enstrom get paired together?
• Galley doesn't watch much Jets hockey, apparently, when talking about standing guys up at the blue line. That doesn't happen.
• Kesler elbowed Myers in the head? Toss him. That's garbage.
• Kesler will sit for two-or-less for his horsepoop move.
• $10 for the first Jet to rip a slapshot off Wild Wing.
• The Jets simply aren't winning foot races right now.
• Trouba rips one off the post!
• Jets are now 0-for-2 on the power-play tonight. C'mon, gents.
• I have to say that the Ducks are really bottling up the neutral zone tonight extremely well. They're almost playing an aggressive left-wing lock.
• That'll do it for the first period. 0-0 after one frame!

SECOND PERIOD

• Everytime someone mentions "Edmonton won the draft lottery", the people around me lose their minds. I'm guessing they're mathematically-eliminated by January next season.
• If I'm the Oilers, I dangle that pick to Arizona for their pick, Oliver Ekman-Larsson, and Mike Smith. And then draft Noah Hanifin. Rebuild is suddenly improved by three years. 
• I love how Sportsnet keeps flashing up the line combos with Benoit Pouliot in there. Pouliot isn't going to change the fortunes of the Oilers.
• And Craig MacTavish basically admits they're taking McDavid. No-brainer there. Which means the Oilers will find a way to screw this up.
• Myers needs to straight-arm Kesler any chance he gets.
• I understand the whistles get put away in the playoffs, but how did Kesler not get called for bear-hugging Scheifele from the face-off dot to the end boards?
• Thank the hockey gods that Pavelec came to play tonight. 
• I was kinda hoping Byfuglien was going to erase Tim Jackman from existence. He opted to play the puck. I can live with that.
• Almost zero chances for both teams in front of the net. This could be a one of those games that's decided off a fluky goal from the corner or something.
• Penalty coming to Anaheim is slashing on Jackman. Give him five and a game for that one. It was on the forearm! Precedence!
• Excellent idea by Wheeler to take it to the net. Gotta see more of that.
• Seriously, Ladd. Seriously. Slashing Getzlaf. You know better.
• How is that not interference on Getzlaf for running a pick on Scheifele?
• Love seeing Jim Slater skate it from behind the net to the blue line just to whip a prayer of a shot wide. Excuse my sarcasm.
• Garry "Ducks" Galley going pro-Anaheim again.
• Jets are playing a wee bit too loose for me right now. Tighten it up, boys!
• Good chance for Lowry off the Stempniak shot, but stick checks are effective, readers. If you're tying up a stick, I present the Anaheim Ducks as your example.
• Someone cover Kesler!!!
• Good job by the Jets in clearing the front of the net. Pavelec saw that one all the way, making the easy save. Gotta keep that going.
• I still have a hard time believing Bruce Boudreau was in Slap Shot.
• ADAM PARDY!!! A great toe-drag to set up the first shot, and he follows up with a wrap-around and it's in the back of the net! 1-0 WINNIPEG!
• This is under review. Wheeler apparently brought the party into the crease.
• Looks fine to me. Not sure why this is taking five minutes.
• Goal stands!
• Anaheim called for a penalty. Kesler's heading off. Send him to the showers.
• Kesler appears to be sitting for elbowing. Dirty player.
• Nothing doing on this power-play either. Maybe we decline them?
• Jets lead after two periods!

THIRD PERIOD

• Need another goal here in the third period. Let's go, Jets!
• Liking this energy from the Jets so far!
• Pavelec with another massive save on Beleskey!!!
• Perreault just got destroyed by Rackell. That's brutal. Suspend him.
• Stafford with a solid wrap-around, but Andersen stops that.
• That end-to-end action is insane!
• Ducks with a ton of pressure.
• Ladd with a dumb, dumb penalty.
• Ok, that flurry of action results in a Ducks goal. Someone scored. Who cares. Ducks tied it up there. 1-1 TIE.
• Jets suck it up and Pavs makes a good save right after the face-off.
• This game is becoming a chess match.
• Are you kidding me? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? Silfverberg should be punched out for that. Holding the stick turns into a goal? Brutal. 2-1 ANAHEIM.
• I'm nearing clinical depression after that goal. Ok, not really. But that one stings. Silfverberg should never gotten to that puck. Cheater.
• That'll do it. I hate this game.

Until next time, I'm getting therapy!